Dad Vibes: Tim Walz and the brilliance of nurturant family politics
VP nominee Walz and the politics of care and empathy
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At FrameLab, we talk a lot about “strict father” morality. This, says Dr. George Lakoff, is the moral worldview underlying the Republican Party.
In books like Moral Politics: How Liberals and Conservatives Think and Don’t Think of An Elephant: Know Your Values and Frame the Debate, Lakoff shows how family metaphors explain American politics. We are first governed in our families, and there are two main models of the family.
Lakoff calls them the "strict father" model and the "nurturant parent" model.
The Strict Father family model
The Strict Father family is hierarchical, with a strict father figure at the top deciding what is right and wrong in a dictatorial fashion.
We see this type of authoritarian structure in the MAGA Republican Party, where Donald Trump is the strict father ruling over everyone else. In the Strict Father family, the leader's word is law, he is right even when he is wrong, and anyone who questions his authority or engages in disobedience must be harshly punished.
We all know this type of man – and this type of politician.
The Nurturant Parent family model
But there’s another family metaphor in politics. It shows a progressive view of how family should work. And Minnesota Gov. Tim Walz expresses it perfectly. This opposing metaphor is that of the Nurturant Parent family. From Don’t Think of An Elephant:
The nurturant parent worldview is gender neutral. Both parents are equally responsible for raising the children. The assumption is that children are born good and can be made better. The world can be made a better place, and our job is to work on that. The parents’ job is to nurture their children and to raise their children to be nurturers of others.
And what does it mean to be a nurturant parent?
It means three things: empathy, responsibility for yourself and others, and a commitment to do your best not just for yourself, but for your family, your community, your country, and the world.
The difference between these two family models explains the main conflict between conservatives and progressives (Republicans and Democrats) in American politics, says Lakoff.
Tim Walz: Nurturant Dad
Look at all of the ways Walz, Kamala Harris' running mate, fits the nurturant model. First of all, he is strong. Strict Father types like to depict nurturance as weak, but the opposite is true. To be nurturant is to be strong, because a nurturant person is someone who has a responsibility to protect others.
Walz served two decades in the National Guard and was a high school football coach. He’s an avid hunter with guns, dogs, the whole bit. In many ways, he’s a typical guy who exudes a classic kind of Midwestern American masculinity.
Yet despite these trappings of old-fashioned masculinity, Walz wholly rejects strict father politics. He was a football coach, yes, but also a teacher. He and his wife, also a teacher, sponsored the high school’s student Gay-Straight Alliance. His care and empathy are also clearly revealed by the fact the he loves animals – he has both a dog and a cat. (Trump despises pets, and his VP nominee, J.D. Vance, has a weird obsession with insulting cat owners.)
Sometimes I wonder what my dog and cat do all day when I'm at the Capitol or traveling the state...
— Governor Tim Walz (@GovTimWalz) December 22, 2019
Merry Christmas from Scout and Afton! pic.twitter.com/dXeQjlWnTY
Most importantly, Walz strongly supports women – including his wife and daughter – and is clearly ready to serve as vice president to one.
It’s impossible to imagine Trump’s Republican Party with a woman at the top of the ticket. That’s just not how Strict Father morality works.
Walz is also a powerful communicator. He speaks about values such as freedom with clarity and authenticity. He is affable, but cutting when necessary. Caring, and uncompromising when it comes to core values. He pushes back – bluntly but calmly – on Republican lies. He is fierce without being nasty or impolite. Affable, but also ruthless (Walz framed up the Republican vibe as "weird," and it stuck). Some call it “Minnesota Nice.”
Republicans are flailing to find a way to tear him down. In so many ways, Walz could be a Republican. But his nurturant values make him a Democrat. Walz is a father figure all right – just not the kind MAGA likes to see. He defies their authoritarian ideal and provides an excellent model of how nurturant values work.
'Midwestern Dad'
Walz’ presence on the national political stage has unleashed a tsunami of "dad memes" on social media.
“Tim Walz is the dad an entire generation wish they had instead of the one they lost to Fox News," read one viral post on X-Twitter.
"Tim Walz in the midwestern Dad we need as VP," wrote March for Our Lives founder David Hogg.
"His male-pattern baldness, bushy white eyebrows, and capacious midwestern cheeks evoke that of an American League Central baseball manager, and he exudes a familiar, affable energy—the kind that suggests the governor could easily teach you how to change a tire or hang some shelves in your family room," wrote Charlie Warzel of The Atlantic. "Walz is, in other words, extremely dad-coded."
Family metaphors matter - a lot
As a woman of color, Vice President Kamala Harris poses a direct challenge to the hierarchical politics of Strict Father Republican morality. By choosing Walz as her running mate, she has doubled down on the strategy.
Walz' nurturant, empathetic dad vibes provide a powerful counterpoint to Trump's selfish, toxic strict father act.
It's a clear example of what Dr. Lakoff has been saying for years: If we want to understand the main conflict in American politics, we must study the conflict between Strict Father and Nurturant Parent moral systems.
What are some other ways Walz demonstrates nurturant dad vibes? Let me know what I missed.
Further Reading/Listening:
Dr. Lakoff and I discussed the Strict Father family in the first episode of the FrameLab podcast in 2017. Listen:
And then we discussed how the Nurturant Parent moral system works:
And here's a short YouTube video of Dr. Lakoff discussing the family models back in 2009: